Thursday, June 28, 2007

For my dear friend,

Today was hard for me but I know that doesn't even come close to what it was like for you. Your strength amazes me and will see you through the hard path that you and your hubby now face.
Life can be so cruel and so many things are unfair. Nothing I say can ease the pain and so all I can offer is my support and a shoulder whenever you need it.
In time you will need more than this though and hopefully I will be able to point you in the direction of some wonderful woman who understand on a more personal level so that you don't have to feel like you're alone. I wish that I could do more. I wish that I could share your pain so that it isn't so raw. I wish that I could take some of the weight off your shoulders so that the future wouldn't seems so scary.

I just hope that you know that you aren't alone and that I know that you won't want to ask for help so when I pitch up on your doorstep you don't need to say anything, you can just be and I will understand.

Comme avec toutes choses, ceci passera aussi


Sunday, June 24, 2007

Thanks and other stuff...

It's been a long month but soon it will be over and hopefully July will bring with it some sunshine because this rain is really starting to piss me off. Cabin fever is not a pretty thing and my twins have it bad!

Today we had a welcome break from the monotony of the weather, the friend whom I mentioned in the previous post brought her hubby and daughter around and we all had a lovely time eating lunch and chatting. The kids get on wonderfully and her husband is an absolute dear. I know things are tough for both of them right now (and seeing the boys playing together can't have helped) but they're handling it as well as the can and were the perfect guests.

It has been such a long time since we've had the opportunity to socialise in such a relaxed manner and I hope that there will be many more opportunities to do so.


On another note I am finally compiling the list of questions and will send them to everyone who has expressed an interest but I could do with a few more. So if you have any questions, either ones that you get asked all the time or ones that you think up for yourself because you want to see what other people are doing then please pop them in the comments or drop me an e-mail.


Things return to normal this week as I am back in the office and so (hopefully) I'll get a chance to post more often.... here's hoping anyway.


Thursday, June 21, 2007

When there are no words....

A very dear friend of mine got some bad news about her pregnancy yesterday and I have no words to comfort her. I know that she is tough and that she can hold it together if she needs too but I know that she is also hurting and I wish that I could help to share the weight.

I know that many of you have experienced great sorrow in your lives and that often it has resulted in a terrible loss so I'm asking for some guidance. So, what if anything have you found helpful? Who has given you the support when you needed it most and what has only served to make things worse?

I don't know what the exact problem is but I do know that the prognosis is bad and final. She's 18 weeks along now and has to face the end is around the corner.


Spare a thought for my dear friend she could use all the internet wishes that you can send.


Friday, June 15, 2007

Twin questions - not answered but asked...

I am supposed to do an entry today just so that I am a bit more up to date but I can't, my brain is tired and my body is weary. Why? I hear all you interested parties ask, well you see my friends, my boys have decided to play tag team at night and we made the mistake of giving in a couple of times so now they think that sleeping with mum & dad is the norm.

The last 2 nights I have tried to take child duty as I am on leave for the next few days and Chris is back at work. The plan has been as follows....

Baby cries, mum reacts by finding dummy, laying baby down and returning to bed.... rinse and repeat until mum grows to weary. Pick up spare duvet and pillows and lie down in the nursery next to the cots so that my reaction time is quicker..... get some sleep.

As the boys had their boosters yesterday I expected some restlessness but they really had planned it well. Thomas was restless for the first half of the night (around 11pm until about 2am) and Nathan picked up where he left off at around 3am.

I guess we'll see how things go over the week-end but I'm a little confused about how to deal with this because we can't even take the cry-it-out option as they wake each other up. Leaving them both awake means that they never go to sleep because they try and out do each others crying.

I'm sure many of you have been in this position before, what did you do? What worked for you and what made things much worse?

Interested to know!


Tuesday, June 12, 2007

I am a bad, bad blogger... (and other random things)

and even apologising is getting tired so, I hereby commit to making a better contribution PLUS there is the whole Round Robin thing that I suggested and have handled miserably...

New rules for the Round Robin: we will do it on the last Friday of every month and I will send out all the questions in e-mail but will also try and figure out a way to keep them here so that any new questions which you would like to add can be. (something about the structure of the sentence is completely off but I can't figure out what it is). Hopefully this will mean that we all have far more preparation time and I will be able to keep up :-)

I'd also like to say thanks to all of you for wishing my boys happy birthday - one day they will be amazed by the wonderful messages from all over the globe!


p.s. I am horribly behind on reading all of you so PLEASE forgive me if I've missed something important!

Wednesday, June 06, 2007

What a difference a year makes!

Exactly 1 year ago today we took our first step on the road that is parenthood. I have so few memories of that day (morphine) but I know that in the days that followed, the true magnitude of the change began to sink in and I was terrified.

A year later and things have continued to evolve and dare I say it, have even become enjoyable :-). There are tough days, and moments when the exhaustion and all the pressures and expectations become overwhelming but for the most part, life is good.

We've had such a lovely day - albeit tiring but it has been exhausting so all my big intentions for the first year post have been shelved temporarily so that I can get an early night.

Until I get a moment to do my sons life justice, here is a visual reminder of where they came from and where they are now....

Friday, June 01, 2007

Friday Round Robin - Question 2 (bltn*)

I know - I must seem like the MOST disorganised person around, I'm not usually this scatty I promise and I will distribute a list of questions to anyone who is interested, just leave a comment (Cass and Stacie, I will send the list to you as well if you're still interested?)

Question 2:
How do you cope with the logistics of having multiple babies and is the pressure always so relentless?

This is question is asked in various ways and it is usually after someone has visited/been visited for a few hours during the 'awake' time. The answer is rather surprising, or it was to me when I first thought it through. The thing is that you do cope most of the time. Having more than 1 baby at a time means that you have to plan more but you also have to accept that your planning will be useless more often. In many ways, my time management has improved drastically to accommodate the feeding/dressing/playing necessities that arise.We get up earlier, and we start getting ready for outings far in advance to allow for any hiccups and we work to a fairly constant routine.

Parenting multiples is about recognising when there is a need to compromise (with your ideals and your partner) and when you need to remain steadfast. I also think that once you've had more than 1 kid depend on you for everything, we get a little 'hooked' on the busy factor. Sure I complain about it all the time and I am in the very fortunate position of having a husband and sister who are always involved and supportive so doing it single would be a completely different story, but it has given me a lot of confidence in my abilities. I have taken on the challenge of doing a degree (something I always intended to do but never got around to it) and I am far more capable than I was before I had kids.

I guess it comes down to having a realistic outlook and fairly low expectations. :-)

* Better Late Than Never