Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Oh the pain!

So I know that it has been a while since the last post (11 days to be precise) and for those of you who noticed, I am sorry. For those of you who didn't, you don't know what you're missing, or perhaps you do which is why you never noticed???

Anyway, here's whats been going on. Last week was a wash as I had a Sales conference to attend and had a meeting with our most valued person. Add to this the driving in between, the bank holiday traffic and the exhaustion associated and you'll see why turning the laptop on became near on impossible.

It was a constructive week (which proves that the t'internet really is addictive) in that I managed to get my assignment completed on time and submitted it early. Made it through a conference of big headed, hot aired sales types without too many scars AND proved my worth to my new boss by impressing the socks off of him during an important meeting.

As it was also the first time that I was away from home and away from the boys I hoped to make the most of it by sleeping as much as possible. In reality I tossed and turned both nights and can only fathom that it was far to quiet! Maybe hotels can offer some kind of background noise option which features crying, moaning babies through the night so that us mums can sleep well!

By the third day I was getting all teary eyed whenever I saw a baby and felt desperately ready to return home. Those of you who are veterans at the 'leaving home for a few days thing' will be laughing right now because you'll know that about 5 minutes after returning home I was redy to leave again :-) - how is it possible for such small creatures to make that much noise and mess?

Anyway, it is good to be back and I know I owe a round rabin e-mail and post - getting to it on the list I promise.


p.s. terribly behind on blog reading too so if something wonderful/terrible has happened, please don't think that I have stopped caring because I haven't!

Friday, May 18, 2007

Multiple Round Robin Carnival

I know that I am behind in posts but Stacey has been kind enough to share her unanswered questions to get us into the swing of things. She has also suggested that we do it carnival style so if you're interested go here.

Mine to follow shortly ;-)

Let me know if it breaks.....

Tuesday, May 15, 2007

Like a bloody murder

(Thank-you for all the lovely comments and e-mails about the previous post. I hope that y'all had a lovely week-end.)

So I have a question to pose to all you mums out there. Is your evening routine as hectic as ours? I sometimes feel like the boys are expecting some kind of beating or something with the way that they carry on and I'm wondering if it's something that we're doing. Let me give you an idea of the routine (which worked perfectly until they got chicken pox, since then, they've become really difficult);

Dinner (usually consists of veggies, chicken/pasta and fruit
5:00pm - 5:45pm
Mum and Aunty K go through reportoire of entertainment as the boredom of the day begins to set in.
Dad gets home and the boys show their delight by frantically demanding his attention.
Dad runs the bath and entertains boys. Mum collects pj's, growbags, dummies, bottles, nappies*, cream, wipes, miscellaneous items used for distraction.
Boys get into the bath and dad pretends to wash them (really it's just an exercise in teaching the boys to splash water all over the place :-))
The boys get out of the bath and this is where the fun begins. They don't mind being taken out of the bath, in fact for some reason they find it quite funny. Until that is, we reach the bedroom and they realise that it is time for them to enter the tomb of death wherein they will be subjected to forceful drying, excessive creaming and mummified in clothing and other sleep gear. I swear that my parents can hear the screams in South Africa. And the twisting and turning seriously tests my patience.
Bottle time. They love this part and are so content that they almost fall asleep on our laps. Unfortunately no matter how carefully we carry them to their cots, by the time we reach the threshold of their room, they're already getting their second wind.
Mum reads a chapter from the Magic Faraway Tree accompanied by the sweet soundtrack of shrieking, sqwauking and chuckling. I think that this may be their favourite time of the day (and to be honest I love their antics too).
Mum & Dad attempt to settle them down for bed. All lights are switched off, dummies are given, muslins are clutched and what follows is anything between 10 minutes and an hour of.... lay down, soothe, calm, attend. Up the stairs, down the stairs until eventually they both give in.

Now I know that it doesn't sound that bad (I realise that now that I'm typing it) but I just don't get what the fuss is about when it comes to dressing them and putting them down? Do all kids do this? Should we change something in the routine? Resign ourselves to our fate?

Let me know how your evening routine pans out, I am so not above poaching all your ideas.


* For some reason I always forget to put nappies out for this change and the RO has to double check me so that we don't find ourselves in an awquard position.

Friday, May 11, 2007

For mothers

So Sunday is Mothers Day in some parts of the world (including South Africa) and my mum sent me an e-mail to commemorate it. Now I have to admit that I don't usually read these e-mails because they are always chain letter type things and they're usually very religious (no offense mean to the religious out there but I prefer to choose to be involved/exposed) but for once I was pleasantly surprised, I even managed to shed a tear.

Unfortunately the author hasn't signed this so I can't give credit where it is due, but if you know who it was or want to claim it as your own then please let me know so that I can amend the details.

For all of you...

This is for the mothers who have sat up all night with sick toddlers in
Their arms, wiping up barf laced with Oscar Mayer wieners and cherry
Kool-Aid saying, "It's okay honey, Mommy's here." Who have sat in
Rocking chairs for hours on end soothing crying babies who can' t be

This is for all the mothers who show up at work with spit-up in their
Hair and milk stains on their blouses and diapers in their purse.

For all the mothers who run carpools and make cookies and sew Halloween
Costumes. And all the mothers who DON'T.

This is for the mothers who gave birth to babies they'll never see. And
The mothers who took those babies and gave them homes.

This is for the mothers whose priceless art collections are hanging on
Their refrigerator doors. And for all the mothers who froze their buns
On metal bleachers at football or soccer games instead of watching from
The warmth of their cars, so that when their kids asked, "Did you see
Me, Mom ?" they could say, "Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the
World," and mean it.

This is for all the mothers who yell at their kids in the grocery store
And swat them in despair when they stomp their feet and scream for ice
Cream before dinner. And for all the mothers who count to ten instead,
But realize how child abuse happens.

This is for all the mothers who sat down with their children and
Explained all about making babies. And for all the (grand) mothers who
Wanted to, but just couldn't find the words.

This is for all the mothers who go hungry, so their children can eat.
For all the mothers who read "Goodnight, Moon" twice a night for a
Year. And then read it again. "Just one more time."

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to tie their
Shoelaces before they started school. And for all the mothers who opted
For Velcro instead.

This is for all the mothers who teach their sons to cook and their
Daughters to sink a jump shot.

This is for every mother whose head turns automatically when a little
Voice calls "Mom?" in a crowd, even though they know their own offspring
Are at home -- or even away at college.

This is for all the mothers who sent their kids to school with stomach
Aches assuring them they'd be just FINE once they got there, only to get
Calls from the school nurse an hour later asking them to please pick
Them up. Right away. This is for mothers whose children have gone
Astray, who can't find the words to reach them.

This is for all the step-mothers who raised another woman's child or
Children, and gave their time, attention, and love... Sometimes totally

For all the mothers who bite their lips until they bleed when their
14-year-olds dye their hair green.

For all the mothers of the victims of recent school shootings, and the
Mothers of those who did the shooting.

For the mothers of the survivors, and the mothers who sat in front of
Their TVs in horror, hugging their child who just came home from
School, safely .

This is for all the mothers who taught their children to be peaceful,
And now pray they come home safely from a war.

What makes a good Mother anyway? Is it patience? Compassion? Broad
Hips? The ability to nurse a baby, cook dinner, and sew a button on a
Shirt, all at the same time? Or is it in her heart? Is it the ache you
Feel when you watch your son or daughter disappear down the street,
Walking to school alone for the very first time ? The jolt that takes
You from sleep to dread, from bed to crib at 2 A.M. To put your hand on
The back of a sleeping baby? The panic, years later, that comes again
At 2 A.M. When you just wan t to hear their key in the door and know
They are safe again in your home? Or the need to flee from wherever you
Are and hug your child when you hear news of a fire, a car accident, a
Child dying? The emotions of motherhood are universal and so our thoughts are for young mothers stumbling through diaper changes and sleep

And mature mothers learning to let go.

For working mothers and stay-at-home mothers.

For mothers-in-waiting and infertility mothers.

Single mothers and married mothers.

Mothers with money, mothers without.

And to those for whom motherhood is still a dream and a wish.

This is for you all.

For all of us.

Hang in there. In the end we can only do the best we can.

Tell them every day that we love them.

I am in awe of you mum, now that I know how hard motherhood is, I cannot begin to imagine how you managed to bring up all 4 of us. I love you and am proud to call you my mum.

Happy Mothers Day y'all!


p.s. I know that this was supposed to be a round robin post it being Friday and all but we'll return to that next week and hopefully I will have distributed the questions to the participating mums by Monday so that they have ample time to prepare :-).

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

I'm alive, barely.

Turns out that the tooth cannot be pulled under a local anesthetic (although they certainly tried) because the tooth is brittle - most likely due to the pregnancy *sigh*. The dentist tried to pull it but it immediately broke up. Instead I have to book into the dental hospital and have them removed surgically. On the one hand I'm glad that I won't be awake through it but on the other I may have to wait up to 8 weeks before it can happen.

I have been given a course of antibiotics to try and control the infection - I am even avoiding alcohol in an attempt to get the better of it.

Now onto more important matters, I have a question to pose to those of you who have had experiences with anti depressant. I have been on fluoxetine for about 10 months now and had my dose increased in January (2 x 20mg capsules daily). Since the dose was increased I have put on an excessive amount of weight and I now find that this is becoming the biggest issue for me. In terms of emotions I am feeling much better and I think that it is a good sign that I am even considering going off the meds because it is a step in the right direction.

Those of you who have been down this road, what do you think? The weight is an issue but I'll put up with it if I need too. More importantly I'll be glad to have the weird dreams stop!

Any advice/assvice is welcome - I could do with some new perspective.



p.s. Thanks to Cass and Stacie for taking part in the round robin. I will try and get my stuff together and get a list of the questions sent out so that everyone has advanced notice - I'll get around to it as soon as possible because I think it was a great idea and I thoroughly enjoyed reading the different perspectives.

Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Emergency Intervention..

I haven't forgotten about any of you I promise!

We've just had a long week-end and I have had an enlarged lymph node in my neck for most of it. I've just come back from the doctor and now I'm off to the dentist to have a back tooth pulled!

I have many problems with this:
1) I have good teeth and I look after them
2) I hate dentists!
3) I have better things to do...

Anyway so I'll be back later and I'll update all of you properly. Until then, send me happy, painfree thoughts please!


Friday, May 04, 2007

Friday Round Robin - Question 1

(Thanks to Stacie because I have totally poached this question from her list to start us off)

How good are your babies at self-entertainment? Do you ever get any moments to yourself? What do you do with those moments?

The first 6 months were awful because they needed constant attention with little interactions. They did sleep a lot more though so getting the laundry done and preparing meals was far more successful.

Once they started sitting I found that they were best entertained by having only a few toys around them as too many distractions just meant that there was a great deal of extra falling over.

Now that they are crawling/standing/climbing life has become more hectic. For some reason they never seem content to just cuddle with me (although they will readily do this with their dad), instead they want to try and throw themselves off the end of the bed or launch themselves at the window whenever I'm around. I am constantly amazed that my sister hasn't had a complete breakdown by now because she spends every afternoon chasing them around.

The boys do play pretty well together and it can get quite funny when they wrestle over a particular object. We have found that although they like their toys they prefer things that they aren't allowed so we have filled all the shelves on their level with odds and ends that are both safe for them to play with and that won't immediately make daddy's hair stand on end (a great example of this is the tv/satellite/radio/xbox remote because every time they go near them we say, 'daddy's gonna shout' so I swear they will think that is what they are called). Their current favourite is an old discarded keyboard, cellphone and replica remote control.

Unfortunately having twins means that there isn't much 'free time'. Over week-ends my hubby looks after the boys quite a lot so that I can get practical things done (laundry, groceries, diy etc) and we haven't quite reached the point where he is comfortable to be left with them or take them out for extended periods of time. Having said that though, I have managed to squeeze in some time for myself as I have just started a part-time degree but I have to admit that all my old favourites like reading have taken a bit of a back seat.

Hopefully now that summer is here (and they LOVE being outdoors) it will mean that a little more time is free to just relax and enjoy them - without sacrificing the many tasks that make any household run.

So that's me done for today, please feel free to take the question to your blog and give us an idea of how things work with you, then leave a comment so that I know that you have!

That's all :-)

Thursday, May 03, 2007

Mums Round Robin - Open invitation!

Stacie has a lovely section on her blog where she answers questions about being a mum. She has kindly allowed me to poach the idea and expand it a little.

On a Friday morning I will post one of the questions and my answer here. Anyone who wants to participate then takes the question away to their blog and gives their own solution.

Hopefully Stacie will help me with the logistics (she mentioned a Mr. Linky??) so that we all know who has taken part. The idea is for us to compare notes and see if anyone else has a solution that we can use. It isn't restricted to twin or multiple mums, anyone can join in and please feel free to spread the word.

So you and you and you and you, watch this space and I'll watch yours.

If you think of a better way of doing this, drop me an e-mail or leave me a comment - I am open to suggestions especially as I am fairly new to this :-)


For always and forever

If you have stuck around through some of the more mundane posts (and I thank-you if you have!) you will know that not to long ago I was pretty disgruntled with the whole work situation. I found it much harder to return to work than I thought possible and I was devistated by the lack of support that I received from my [then] manager. Fortunately, he has since moved on to terrorise err I mean manage some other poor bugger and has been replaced by a far more stable and personable chap.

Anyway, long story short my new boss has granted my request for flexible working in that I have been able to drop my weekly hours slightly so that I can spend an afternoon a week with my boys. Yesterday was the first such afternoon.

I don't quite know what I expected. I guess I had somehow convinced myself that this selfless(hah!) act would be hugely appreciated by my pre-ones and in return they would shower me with love and kittens and maybe even a blissful afternoon to be envied by all. Sadly this isn't quite how it worked out. In general it was a nice afternoon, I picked my sister up from wor, picked the boys up from their childminder and took them ..... wait for it.....


grocery shopping! (I'll bet that you're so glad that you waited huh?)

And somewhere between the aisles froxen chicken and tinned lentils, it occurred to me that this was it, for always and forever, Wednesday afternoons were no longer someone else's domain.


p.s. before you get too jealous, I kept the boys out too long so they became overtired and wouldn't nap. They also woke up about a gazillion times last night and I'm sure that they are getting another cold. Oh well, you can't have it all.

Tuesday, May 01, 2007

A friend IRL!

If I compare my life in the UK to my life in South Africa there are many differences. Some are obvious (marriage, children, weather) and some of them are only obvious to me like the lack of close, tangible friendships. If I am honest, it is one of the few things that I miss about South Africa (obviously I miss my family to but that is different) and I wish that I knew how to go about changing this sad state of affairs.

As a result I think that maybe I come across as being a bit desperate when I meet someone who I see as potential friend material. More than anything it is because I would like to fast forward through the awkward beginning phase and go straight to teasing, laughing, supporting, bonding stuff and I guess there aren't many people who agree.

A couple of days ago however, a new person started with our company and as she is one of my team members, I have been given the task of making sure that she is settled, introduced to everyone and just generally well inducted (is that a word??) and I have been very pleasently surprised by her. You see the thing is that she is French.... there I said it, will I feel the full fury of god now or later?) and we all know how most of the English feel about the French! I like her though. She is witty, sarcastic and best of all a new mum who doesn't feel strongly about any particular parenting technique, instead resorting to bribery wherever necessary.

I am hoping that this has the potential to become a real friendship because I really am late in the application process and I could definitely due with a friend in real life too!