Just after the boys were born I had a moment wherein I felt an immense amount of grief for all the wonderful, fantastic and awesome woman whose stories I followed but who had yet to fullfil the dream of motherhood. In the months that followed their birth when I struggled with the reality that I wasn't the mother I had always expected I would be (cool, calm, competant) but rather frazzled and surviving from one moment to the next I sometimes felt that maybe those were the lucky ones but as the PND passed and the boys grew, I realised that it really is the thing which makes us complete even if it isn't in the way that we expected.
All this thinking (a rarity for me I can assure you) coupled with the information that it was possible for me to try and do something about it led to a conversation with my hubby about the possibility of egg donation. As always he was (and is) tremendously supportive and with his blessing I began to investigate the options. Initially I was going to return to my home nation of South Africa where a blogging friend was in the midst of setting up an egg donation charity but it was then brought to my attention that the UK is has a serious shortage of egg donors and that the average woman can wait up to 10 years so it seemed that there was just as pressing a need close to home.
In November last year I started the process and attended an appointment with a psychologist to discuss the many aspects which can affect a person. Thankfully, through reading all the amazing stories that all of you write daily I had already thought about many of the supposed pitfalls and potential issues and so this session was actually more of a chat ;-).
In December I met with the embrologist at St Mary's Hospital in Manchester and had several blood tests done to ensure that I was free of HIV, Hepatitis and other incurable diseases (I was). Last week I had my follow up meeting and so the leg work is almost done. All going according to plan, I will start the medical side toward the end of March and by the end of April it will all be done.
I have resurrected my blog because I want to document the steps (I will dedicate a post to each stage, including the early ones) in the hope that more woman will be encouraged to follow suit.
I hope that you will find it interesting and informative and that you will encourage your sisters and friends to at least consider the possibility because I can't imagine what my life would be like without the boys and I really want every woman to have the choice, even if it means sharing a little part of myself.
I know that this is a brief post and that it doesn't begin to address the true depth of all the elements to thhis proces but rest assured that I will get there and I hope that you'll join me in creating wider discussion.
All the best :-)